How many times have you caught yourself looking for an “appropriate response” to what a woman told you?
How many times have you wanted to respond with the “right thing” to something she told you?
In reality it goes something like this:
You start talking to a beautiful and sexy woman who you are interested in. You get a feeling that you must “succeed,” and a desire begins for you to do “everything right.” You do not want to make mistakes that will fail you in her eyes.
You want to say the most appropriate words for the situation, behave in the best way, make the right impression, and respond perfectly to everything she says.
Familiar with this situation? I have good news and bad news…
On the one hand the desire to do “everything right” and succeed with a woman is excellent, but it can also be very destructive. This desire causes you to respond to any comment, question or sentence spoken by the woman.
The reason for such behavior is simple – every man wants to look good in the eyes of a woman he likes.
This desire causes the man to try and give a “good response” to almost everything that comes out of the woman’s mouth. He tries to think of a response that will present him in a positive light and leave a lasting impression on her. However, this is where the problem begins.
As soon as you start commenting on everything the woman says, you immediately convey this message to her: “I was turned on by you, and I really want to be liked by you.”
No matter how witty or appropriate your reactions may have been, the fact that you gave her a lot of attention makes her realize that you want her and are trying to impress her.
Don’t worry, most men do this as soon as they are turned on. You are not the only one who has this harmful habit. I call men who try to comment on everything a woman says an “obsessive respondent.”
The “obsessive respondent” is a man who tends to respond immediately to anything a woman says.
He sincerely believes that this is the right thing to do, and does not realize that it is not mandatory to respond to everything a woman says, it can even be destructive!
When a man responds to every stimulus that comes from a woman, she will pick it up and immediately “disqualify” such men. Women see such behavior as insecurity from a man who obsessively listens to every word she utters in order to respond to it seriously and give it attention.
Many times a lack of response, is the best response
Take a second to think about heroes played by actors like Brad Pitt, or any other “superhero” you know from a movie. The thing that makes them charismatic figures and makes women attracted to them is their lack of immediate response.
It is as if everything that happens around them does not move them to elicit a response. They are not emotionally affected by their environment.
When a woman tells them something, they do not suddenly start smiling. Their faces remain frozen and they do not move a muscle. They see what is happening around them, but do not respond to it immediately. First, they digest what has occurred and only then do they exercise discretion; is it worthwhile to respond, and if so, how?
The difference between being a “superhero” and being an “obsessive respondent” is the way you react to your environment.
To become a “superhero” with women, you should not react to the first sentence that seems logical to you. Instead, you should take a few seconds break, decide whether it is worth responding at all, and only then choose the appropriate response.
Next time you talk to a girl, use the following method:
After the woman tells you something, do not respond for at least 5 seconds. Simply remain silent and do not change your facial features in any way. If after that you decide that you want to say something and it’s really important – say it. On the other hand, if all you wanted to do was just to comment something, then it’s better not to comment at all.
I’m not asking you to be tactless. If she asks you a question, answer her question. However, if she just gave her opinion on something, there is no need to comment on it. You can remain silent, start talking about some new topic, or ask her something that has nothing to do with what she had just said.
When you do not respond to the woman’s words and continue to be silent and look her in the eye, she’ll subconsciously begin to look at you differently. She tells herself, “There is an interesting man here… he does not behave like a judge and is not moved by me. This is a challenge…”
Once a girl notices that she is unable to get reactions out of you easily and that you are not influenced by her, she no longer sees you as the good guy who notices everything she says and tries to impress her. Instead, she begins to see you as a challenging man, who unlike most men, does not rush to please her.
First, this immediately challenges her. Second, it activates a mechanism in her that I call “proving female charm” – once she feels her influence on men is undermined, she must prove to herself that she is still “fit.” That she is beautiful and attractive enough that men still want her. This is exactly the stage where she starts chasing after you, trying to please you and the exchange turns upside down. You are now in the role of the “not interested” and she is in the role of the “interested.” This is exactly the opposite of what it was in the beginning. From here you just have to know how to take it further, to more advanced and intimate stages.
When you are not familiar with key principles, you may make mistakes that will cost you repeated failure with women.
On the other hand, when you understand how things work, you can easily meet women and form intimate relationships with them whenever you want – it feels wonderful.
Do not let life as a couple pass you by and leave you behind…